Carpe Diem

Rambling snobbery - books, music, food, knitting and sewing

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Diamond in the Snow

I am really sick of hearing about "paradigm shifts" and such things since my paradigm has been shifted so many times I frankly don't know which end is up! But that said - I do think it's time to change the old guard - do something drastically new - shake the sheets as it were. Lately I'm working on being positive in the face of potential disaster and not just smiling in it's face, but actually full on getting behind it and shoving! Not laying down on the tracks and looking away from the train hoping it won't hurt that much - but running beside it and trying to jump on. See where it's going. Maybe I'll like it. Yes, I will like it because it's not here.

I'm not necessarily talking place - but place of mind. Not sleeping through the big stuff, nor the small. Being present and not distracted by the myriad tasks and priorities I set. Learning, stretching and growing in different uncomfortable directions.

In two weeks everything my family owns will be put in boxes and shipped 5 states away from what I've known of home for the last 40 years. That in itself should shift a few things, but frankly it's time for something else. A new WORD, a new something that will make a difference.

My husband and I were walking to a restaurant to say goodbye to some friends of ours that we will most likely never see again. As we were walking I looked down into the salt and snow and saw a "diamond" - of course I picked it up and had wild dreams of fortune (or at least a tiny bit of cash). It is of course not a diamond but a CZ. But before I found that out - it really hit me that it didn't matter either way. It was a diamond to me and the "reality" of it didn't change. Just my value on it. How I perceived it. It was a diamond because I said it was.

I have decided to embrace the positive in everything because that is the only reality there is. Joy in the face of whatever. Yes I was a bit let down because it's not worth actual money. But maybe down the road I will be different enough because of this that my career soars. Yes the money would have been wonderful to have, but if I can find something that changes how I look at things - at the world for the better, kicks me in the ass so to speak - it could have been 10 carats worth of diamond I found in the snow - decidedly no less valuable.


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