evanescence

holy feel the love batmanOkay so it's my birthday (yesterday - thanks) and like just about everyone I know and love sent me a love o gram in one way shape or form. And then today I get to see evanescence at the rave. How freakin cool is that? But on one seeming dark note - every year on my birthday I ask God what the next year holds or for a word for the coming year so to speak. And I got one word. Pain. Now normally that would strike fear in to the hearts of well - me. But Jabez means pain and God blessed him up one side and down - so I am prepared for blessing and whatever God has in store for me. I have a feeling it's going to be an exciting year - but definetely not an easy one. I guess you have to step out and accept what He has for you and fly standby if that's what gets you to your destination without too much bitchin. I have learned in the 37 spins on this bad boy around the sun that I need to enjoy the ride WAAAAAAYYYYY more than I do and worry about the trivial WAYYYYYY less. Life is short and the ones you love leave you too early and though you may get to see them again (okay so sue me I believe in heaven for the Jesus freaks) it's still a ride you don't get to do over. I'm sorry I don't believe in karma - I really wish I did - but Pride does go before a fall and since they ususally tie in I guess it does makes sense on some twisted level - but anyway - this is it for me and though we are all eternal beings it's truly a choice what type of eternity we get. That totally blows my mind. It's up to us. And not only is the eternity up to us - this ride is up to us mostly as well! If something shitty happens - it's up to us how we deal. If something awesome happens - ditto. It really is all up to us - which is the big reason this country SUCKS! I am sorry darwinists - we are not getting better - we suck big time! And it's only getting worse. I pick heaven - but in the mean time - we should take care of our house! Get that?